I would make a good stoner

For those of you that know me, know that I would never touch the stuff, but damn, I have anxiety and I would make such a fun stoner.
A few years back traveling came easy, no stress, just whatever, rolling with the punches.  Fast forward a few years and a wife and gromlin in the picture and I am a complete mess while traveling.  My anxiety levels just booking a ticket for a flight leads me to closing the webpage three to four times before I actually book the ticket.  This generally costs me more money because, afterall, procrastination is like masterbation, youre only screwing yourself.  When I get to the airport my levels are pretty normal for the most part.  Security always sucks, so I come prepared for that.  But I have a little ritual.  A 16 oz coffee and a fruit parfait from Starbucks is the ticket.  Yeah, yeah, Im sure the caffeine probably doesnt help my situation, but hey get off me, its my jam.
I always try to get on the left side of the plane.  For some reason, and I dont know why, I feel more comfortable on the left side, and try and be at the wing or forward.  Everytime I go to the back of the plane I swear I can feel every little bumps there is. Its the suck!  Enter medicinal marijuana.  ahhh calm and collected Jonas, with more munchies than usual. hahaha.
It isnt going to happen, weed is lame, so is self medicating.  But I do need to meditate or something.  I already have high blood pressure (thanks dad), so I need to be careful with my stress levels.
At the end of the day, I have a good life insurance policy, and alway book my tickets with my AMEX that also pays out to the wifester, so she is set, and really, thats all she cares about.

So yeah, in ending, Im not going to start smoking weed, maybe just lay off the caffeine and hijack/plane crash movies................